Hello, there.

So im just going to fucking say it. 

I miss Michelle incredibly. More than I have in the last 5 years or so.

Life has been completely different since you walked out on my life, and not a single day goes by that I dont wonder if youre safe, if youre happy with whomever it is youre dating nowadays..I often wonder whats become of Jack, whats become of Snowball..

But above all else, I wonder if you still have the St.Michael statue I gave you for Christmas those many years ago, and if you do, do you think of me every time you hold it?

You were the only one, the ONLY one, who got me. My biggest regret has been and will forever be, letting you walk away. Nobody has came close to loving me as much as you did, and I dont foresee anyone will. 

Life just isnt what I thought itd be without you. Im so fucking sorry for the things I said out of anger and childish drama..

All I want out of this world is for you to come back :(

Watching the girls I failed drop me like a bad habit and completely forget the type of person I am. 

Yes, I freak out when I lose someone. Yes, I dont handle change well., Yes, I do have anger outbursts on certain nights, and often isolate myself because I feel like I have literally let down the only people that have ever truly mattered to me more than anything.

If they could see past my imperfections in a relationship, why cant they see it when its over? Its pretty much like…”Well, fuck you.”

So, let me get this straight;

I work full-time, transport my sister, have my own car, pay for my gas, pay for my own car repairs, buy what I need, and you think the fact I smoke weed has become a problem? If anything I would think you would’ve noticed that I haven’t had any anger flares in quite some time, because that was a huge issue. Instead you choose to not really acknowledge much of my happenings as of late except for the one “negative”, as you see it, thing I do.

Seriously mother, stop being so fucking naive.

When do I get to be happy again?…

I hate this…